How can I be lonely? I live in Los Angeles?!

self esteem

Being alone vs being lonely

 

There are about 10 MILLION people in the LA area and yet many would describe themselves as lonely. There is no shortage of things to do or people to do them with, so what gives?

Well, as it turns out, there is a difference between being alone and being lonely.‬

Loneliness does not come from being alone, it comes from feeling left out or that you don’t belong. And, let’s face it, if you feel like you don’t belong then chances are you are not going to go get together with a bunch of strangers from meetup or take a cooking class by yourself, even though you may actually enjoy it.

Loneliness robs us of our quality of life because it, in part, prevents us from going out and doing stuff we would enjoy… because we don’t want to do those things alone.

Holidays can magnify this feeling of loneliness because watching others fit in and have fun reminds us that we are isolated. Maybe you don’t get invited out for new years, no one expressing their “undying love” to you on Valentine’s Day. You are sitting home seeing everyone else’s pictures of barbecues and swimming pools over the 4th of July.

For all of the benefits of social media it really intensifies feelings of social isolation. But there are skills we can learn to help ourselves fit in better. We do not have to stay lonely. Just because we do not fit in with one group of people does not mean that we do not fit in with any group of people.

If you’re struggling, reach out. There is always hope, sometimes we just need a little help to find it. I’d love to help you find your place in life.

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